On March 9 it was 19 years since we said hello to the little boy who couldn’t stay—the only child I was able to carry to term. 

Even after all this time and after all the times I’ve told the story, retelling the details of Thomas’ birth and death can still rip me wide open. And that’s what it’s doing right now.

So to protect my energy while still honouring Thomas and this beautiful project, instead I’m choosing to make the same request we make each year on his birthday: if you’re reading this, please look for a way to be extra kind to someone in Thomas’ memory. It’s how we keep him present in our lives and how we hope he can continue to change the world, even after all this time. 

Because although he may have only been here for 20 hours, it was his whole life. And to us, it was just as big and beautiful and meaningful as every life is.

—Kristin Fitzgerald-Zita