My journey through birth trauma and perinatal mental health began in the early hours of July 31, 2022, when my husband and I went to the IWK after noticing our baby hadn’t been moving much. Upon arrival, the nurse couldn’t find his heartbeat and called for the OB on call, who used the ultrasound machine…

You didn’t have an easy start did you? We didn’t have an easy start. Perhaps this was our first of many lessons together. Life is not easy, no one said it should be and it’s OK to struggle.  Labour started early early in the morning of November 15th. My water broke when I was getting…

My story, as with many other women, is not always understood.  Hearing things like “but you have a family!” Or “you have healthy children!” Or “you have four kids! Be thankful!” does not negate the loss of life, my hopes and dreams and plans of life, that I still lost. That my body for whatever…

My partner had a heart attack, albeit minor, just as I rounded out 30 weeks. I knew I was fine and healthy but screaming into a pillow not knowing how to handle my own reactions was possibly my breaking point. During that time, I remember the kindness of a phone call from a friend or…

Dear Reader, I am not sure what lifestyle would allow mothers to truly declare “Motherhood is easy.” Of the women I now talk with who have babies, many of us feel resentful of the imagery of a peaceful baby and calm, relaxing days with nothing else to do. All we had to do was take…

On March 9 it was 19 years since we said hello to the little boy who couldn’t stay—the only child I was able to carry to term.  Even after all this time and after all the times I’ve told the story, retelling the details of Thomas’ birth and death can still rip me wide open.…

My child was born late, as late as the current medical model of birth lets you go. I knew we’d be pushing it, I was late, and many other babies in my family were born at the 42-week mark. This baby was waiting. The joke was that they would stay put until their dad’s birthday.…

When I think of my experience giving birth I think about all that went wrong or the things that didn’t go as planned and the idea that you are just supposed to forget all of that because you now have a baby. I did all the reading, and tried to hear all the birth stories…

My contractions started at 2:00 am, which I kept to myself. My husband, Conor, and our son, Arthur, were asleep in the other room. I’ll let them sleep, I thought. Tomorrow will be a busy day.  Like with Arthur, this pregnancy we planned to have at home. My birth with him was smooth despite taking…

My labour and delivery were magical. I was within the right age-range, health requirements, geographic parameters, and availability of service, to be able to access midwife care. We had given thought to ritualizing this little one’s entry into the world with our own birthing ceremony. Baby was born at home in a birthing pool with…